Physics to Layman Dictionary

Hey guys.  I got bogged down grading mit-terms yesterday and completely forgot to post something.  I don't have the continuation to my latest series, but here's something to keep you entertained.

When a Physicist Says	The Layman Hears	But the Physicist Probably Meant
Theory	Wild Guess	Scientific Understanding
Model	Wiled-Guess-Making Machine	Accurate-Prediction-Making Machine
Mathematics	Magic	Logic
Hypothesis	Unfounded Guess	Educated Guess
Speculation	Cutting Edge	Wild Guess
Astronomy	Astrology	Physics… IN SPACE
Quantum Physics	Magic and/or Metaphysics	The Standard Model of Particle Physics
Evolution (Biology)	Blasphemous Account of the Origin of Life	Scientific Account of the Diversity of Life
Evolution (Physics)	Blasphemous Account of the Origin of Life	Scientific Account of the way Systems Change Over Time
String Theory	Cutting Edge or Wild Guess	Mathematical Field with Potential Application to Particle Physics
Probability Theory	Wild Guess	Mathematical Field
Evidence	Observation I Claim to have Made	Observation Confirmed by Multiple Independent Groups of Experimenters
Cosmology	Metaphysics and/or Blasphemy	Physics… IN SPACE
Social Science	Scientific Study of Society	Pseudo-Scientific Study of Society
Scientist	Someone with a Bachelor’s Degree	Someone with a Ph. D in some type of Physics, Chemistry, Biology, Geology, or Possibly Mathematics or Computer Science
Scientific Consensus	Opinion of Scientists	Statement for which Multiple Groups have Independently Obtained Evidence
Relative	Subjective	Objective and Dependent Upon Some Parameters
Physicist	Theorist	Theorist or Experimentalist
Experimentalist	Inventor	Hypothesis-Tester
Fundamental	Basic, Easy	Cutting-Edge
Entropy	Disorder	Number of Identical Microstates
Second Law of Thermodynamics	Systems Tend to Become More Disordered Over Time	The Most Probable Macrostate is the one which Describes the Most Microstates
Conservation of Energy	Energy can’t be Created or Destroyed	The Total Mass-Energy of a Closed System is Constant in Time
Conservation of Mass	Matter can’t be Created or Destroyed	Conservation of Energy
Spacetime	Space and Time	A Four-Dimensional Non-Euclidean Space
Cold	Below 0 Degrees Fahrenheit	Context Sensitive, but Often a few Millikelvin
Hot	Above 100 Degrees Fahrenheit	Context Sensitive, but Often Several Megakelvin
Lightyear	A Really Long Time	Over 5,000 Trillion Miles
Nuclear	Atomic Bomb Material	Dealing with the Nucleus of an Atom
Radiation	Dangerous Shit	Light
Electron	A Tiny Billiard Ball	A De-Localized Quantum Object
Squark	An Attempt at Parody	A Scalar Quark
Classical	Greek	Non-Quantum
LASER	Pointer or Weapon	Light Amplification by Stimulated Emission of Radiation
Entanglement	Buddhism	A Multi-Particle State which Cannot be Factored into Single-Particle States
Not a Scientific Question	THERE IS A GOD!!!1!!	Too Controversial or Meaningless to Bother with
Approximation	Horribly Inaccurate Guess	Within 10% Accuracy
Confident	Arrogant	It is Statistically Improbable that I am Wrong
Improbable	40% Chance	5% Chance or Less
Probable	60% Chance	95% Chance or More
Chaotic	The Physics Behind this is Unknown	This is so Sensitive to Hard-to-Measure Initial Conditions that we can’t Predict it Even Though we Know the Physics Behind It
Parity	Charge (Confused with Polarity)	Mirroring Every Axis
Quantify	Remove all Emotion	Make More Specific
Brane	Brain	Membrane
Observer	Human Being	Non-Sentient Instrument
String	Violin String	One-Dimensional Analog of a Particle
Unsure	THERE IS A GOD!!!1!!	We have not Finished Investigating
Information	Ability to Convey an Idea	Learn Quantum Information Theory to Find Out
Unitarity	UNTRANSLATABLE1	The Fact that Total Probability is Always 100%
Published	Printed Somewhere	Printed in a Peer-Reviewed Journal
Peer-Reviewed	My Friend Okayed It	A Qualified Scientist I’ve Likely Never Met Okayed It
Vacuum	Nothing	Spacetime with Non-Zero Energy
Star	Big Ball of Fire	Enormous Object Undergoing Nuclear Fusion
Simulation	Pretend Science	Computer-Driven Model
Interference	Static	Interaction of Two Waves
Natural Law	Constraint on Reality	Description of Reality
Noise	Sound	Not Signal
Precise	Accurate	Capable of Detecting Small Changes